i can just sit here and continue to erase the words on the screen. or i can post. no screw that, i won't. refusal to click the button. refusal to publish my post. but why? this is pointless- no one can read this. 

in my all consuming world- in my all consuming world that is my mind. who cares about petty things. i do. i try so hard to forgive and forget, but when all it is is screaming noise and  i can't make any noise because i'm already screaming. 

they are sharks. great white sharks with sharp teeth that slowly and agonizingly pierce your skin. feel that layer of epidermis break. and then the blood begins to spurt. or trickle. let them take a limb. it'll satisfy them. oh, not for long. they'll rip and shred and tear. fissures in bones. they take every last morsel. 

-pause-

you slip up. you say that one thing that's forbidden to be said. that one word, and everything becomes pell-mell.  it'll take a lifetime for order to reign again. 

ps. being married doesn't save you. it just makes the rain wait a little. 

pps. i clicked 'publish post'. the world will now explode.